The scenario: The boy initiated the date. The rule: The check comes. She reaches for her purse. He says he'll pay. She resists. He insists. Do not deviate from this pattern. There are signals flying all over the place here, but they're usually totally unique to the individual so you're not going to be able to figure them out on the first date. Lots of women will let the guy pay if she's interested and will try harder to contribute money if they're not. I'll go the other way: try harder to contribute money if I like the guy, and won't bother if I don't.

The scenario: the girl initiated the date. The rule: The check comes. She reaches for her purse. He says he'll pay. She resists. He insists. Just do it ok, boys? It's nicer that way. Even if you're not interested in dating her. It's gentlemanly and makes you look good. She's been stressed all night because she asked you out and maybe that was too forward and maybe she should have just waited and on and on. Then you pay for dinner. And it makes everything ok. It makes you an active participant in the date and it means that you didn't hate being there all night. At the very least, split the check.

Note this has nothing to do with subsequent dates. Pay attention and figure that part out on your own. Some women think they should always be paid for. Personally, I'm a believer in not making a big deal about it, but keeping an eye out to make sure that things end up pretty evenly in the end. He pays for dinner; I pay for the movies. That kind of thing.